The things you don’t say….

I formulate toiletries.

That makes me evil.

Sorry if that sounds strange, but quite often its the response that a largish part of the general public has.

Now who exactly you pin the source of this  image onto is a moot point.

The favoured targets from my side of the fence when we’re having a few too many in the bar after work, are the purveyors of “Natural” products, anti-vivisection action groups, the usual suspects

The usual comments are


Errr actually no. Its not been done for ages IN THE UK.

The biggest Animal testing house in the UK I believe is Huntingdon Life Science. They gave up the licence for this part of the business years ago, because quite frankly they couldn’t be bothered to renew it. They hadn’t got any work off it.

The only time I’ve used toiletries products on an animal was when my dog rolled in something that was definately NOT Chanel No.5.

That involved a bottle of wash n go, a bathroom with the door wedged shut, and a wet hound that afterwards proceeded to dry itself on every carpet and rug in the house. Loverly.

Once you point out that certainly the own label, and quite a few of the brands test on Human volunteers, that does defuse the situation a wee bit, and then the conversation then turns to either the benefits of a particular product or the latest scare story in the Daily Mail.

Sometimes you get the one person who spoils it for the rest of the Human Race. This is when you get a Scientist on full sarcasm mode.

Example “You test on animals, how could you …”

Reply “Hell yeah rats and guineapigs, I love the squealing they make”

“You do what!!!!???”

“Yeah the Guineapigs are the people I work with, and the Rats wear suits and run the show. You should have heard the squeals when I tried a Granny fragrance on the 18 year old student who was on a promise that night” ;P

If that doesn’t work there is always the comment about baby lotion and baby oil, containing real baby, but thats tasteless and I haven’t said that



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